Christ is my rock, my redeemer, my everything.

i sort of love sundays now. i never thought i would actually say that before. i mean, i hated church. i hated the people in ward. i hated everything about sundays. but now, i don't. my sunday schedule:
6:00-8:30: chores.
9-12: real church(: my favorite part of the week.
1-4: church with my parents.
my parents and i made a deal. i could go to my church every week as long as my homework was all done and my chores are done. the first couple of weeks, i was terrified, and went to the main service and left. but one week, i made a friend. his name is nate and he invited me to the youth service after the main service. it's called "redefined high school" and it's been the best thing for me. the main focus is having good, positive, uplifting relationships with Christ. He has to be the center of your life, and when you put Him center, everything else falls into place or out of importance. i have also learned a lot about having positive relationships with my peers. it's hard to find people in my school or neighborhood who have the same beliefs as me, because i am no longer LDS, but i have learned to be friends with people who are accepting of me. does that mean i'm not the major source of missionary work? no, it doesn't. does that mean that some people don't want to be in the same room as me? yes, it does. but, that's their loss. i know what i believe. and i'm going to stand up for my beliefs, and share them with others, without forcing anything. eventually, God will show them the truth of my words, and they'll know. 
but, today, in youth services, we talked about dealing with the "missionary efforts". sam and kit are so cute in how they described it. you have to listen to their message. listen and take note of the similarities. tell them of the similarities in your beliefs, and then say very kindly, "i already have my beliefs, but thank you so much for sharing with me yours." and then walk away. when they're in missionary mode, they won't be listening to your beliefs, so you have to just walk away. oh sam and kit. they are kind of my new role models. i sort of think i want to be a youth ministry leader when i "grow up". i told sam and kit that today, and they said i already am. by having a positive attitude about the whole situation with my family, and how strong i already am, considering how new i am to the ministry, i am being a strong role model to not only the other youth, but also the children and the adults. oh, speaking of which, i'm helping with the main service next week:/ sharing my conversion story and how i'm staying strong when so many people are telling me to be otherwise. i'm nervous, but i have God on my side(: not really anything to worry about.
well, i'm off to my parents church now. positive attitude is everything(: 


ooh ooh ooh!!! guess what! i might be going on a mission to russia this summer! sooo excited(: