we stopped looking for monsters under the bed when we realized the monsters were inside of us.

i was bullied,
i battled eating disorders.
i lived through abuse.
i pulled through rape.
i fought cancer and won.
i am still surviving bipolar disorder.
and that's not all.


i looked back on my life yesterday,
and i realized i have nothing to live for.
all the pain,
the strength,
the hard battle,
they mean nothing.
i have nothing to live for.


what did i fight so hard for?