i'm telling you.

right now & always.
remember this.
there is a person out there who can erase everyone else.
who can make up for every bad thing that anyone has ever done to you.
there is a person who will completely be everything you, everything you need.
who will love you for exactly who you are.
they will be perfect in every way because they just are.
you will not want to change a thing about them.
you will feel lucky every day, that you are the one who gets to be in their presence.
you will feel lucky and grateful, you will not want anymore, you will appreciate what you've been given, for the first time in your life full of changing your mind and never knowing what you want.
it will all finally be clear and simple.
no more searching for home.
you'll know when you get there, how couldn't you?
sure, it's what we all want.
sure, i'm making this seem easy.
but trust me, i know it's not,
but fuck settling for anything but the one that is diamonds and milkshakes.
fuck living your life wondering is you made the right choices.
staring at every guy who walks by and wondering what it would be like to be with them, fuck that.
sure it's easy to try and be reasonable, practical, find someone who is a really good match, take a good seat instead of waiting in line for years for the best one.
but this is the most important decision you will ever make. 
you will spend your entire life with this person, every day.
you will maybe raise kids, continue the human race, with this person.
are you really going to give up on the idea that there is someone that is everything you always dreamed of and more?
i'm not.
i'm not stupid.
i hope everyday that i'm not crazy,
and you know what?
i'm not.
fairytales exist, most people just don't want them bad enough.
maybe i'll fail and you can all say, "look at you now, miss-know-it-all, now you have nothing."
i can accept that.
it's not easy to think about but i'd rather have nothing than never know if the most beautiful creature on the planet could be mine.
i guess we'll see.